I used to HATE my profile

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Jacki Spellman LS

October 29 · 

I had a conversation tonight with another stylist, Jason J. Daniel who re-sparked something I had said in a live video a month ago. About how I value beauty. About how most stylists value creating beauty because they have felt ugly at some point, so we value creating it for others.

The truth is, I have spent a lot of my life hating what I saw in the mirror. It took me years to see beauty in myself. There were times that no matter what anyone else said, I didn’t believe it.

I mostly hated my profile. In middle school I was called a “witch” like, A LOT! “No halloween costume needed for Jacki SPELLMAN!” ... Neener, neener assholes 🖕.

I tend to look like I’m glaring or scowling naturally, especially then. I carried that with me until very recently. Can you guess what I’ve never been for Halloween?

But something switched inside me (which is a whole other story) while it was so easy for me to see & provoke beauty in others, it was not always so easy inside myself.

What’s important now is that I do see it, I actually enjoy my pointy profile now. My husband had always said it is his favorite thing about my looks, while it was a cause of disdain for me. I would never allow a photo of my profile, but now I see the beauty in it. Growing up & Glowing Up helps. Being in your 30’s and giving less fucks about things that are surface deep helps. I think acceptance comes easier as we age.

I’m not sure what you may need to do to see this inside yourself if you don’t. But I would encourage you to see yourself as a worthy being of Earth & Universe that God & so many other people love. I would also encourage you to sit & look deep inside your own eyes & tell the person in the mirror that you are beautiful & worthy repeatedly until you believe it, daily.

Beautiful makeup, lashes & hair help of course. But I’ve had all those things & still felt ugly & unworthy before too. So reach inside & find the beauty you hold. I promise it’s there.

Get Lifted Loves

❤️ Jacki Spellman

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